“The “Good Scène” is too much”

Brian Lynch

What is the “Good Scene?”

The good scene is simple to understand. It is about those situations in which we feel good, interested, and joyful.I explain this situation often in various ways. 

It is thought that throughout our childhood we will have feelings of interest and joy and for the most part they are  accepted as the way things should function.

The problem is that bad feelings are inevitable. These bad feelings are often the consequence of something that thwarts our interest or joy. 

Now what happens to someone that gets their interest lambasted all the time?

Well, it hurts and it hurts a lot.

 

They might come to relate their interest directly to shame and hurt. That is, how can my interest be worth anything? No one lets me pursue them.

So we grow and because of our nature as humans, we cannot help but be “interested” in the world. We do feel good despite ourselves, but in those of us who have been robbed of more “good times” than not, well, don’t you think it would be reasonable for us to have some fear? Fear that any good time I have will end by some fateful act or someone’s hand?

We become constantly on guard when we start to feel good. Our subconscious starts to interpret any of these feelings as being “too good to be true.” Watch out we say to ourselves this cannot last. This good scene cannot last.

This has the most tragic consequences as the better the scene is here in the present the greater the fear that it will end.

It is only natural that I will be confused and probably withdraw. I may even do something to make sure the situation will come to an end. I will ruin the good scene. This is why we sabotage relationships over and over again. We cannot believe they will las